Saturday, August 29, 2009

Interracial Relationships

18-year-old Mimi from Canada writes:

Hey Chauntel :)

I have been dating this guy for about a month now and it's going really really well. He's been a fantastic boyfriend. I've found someone who I match with. Anyways it's been going pretty well but I have two little problems. The first thing is that this summer he's gone to the yukon for two monthes because he's doing military training. I know i'm going to miss him alot but this is in preparation for when he joins the real army next year. I want to be supportive of his decision but If he joins the military he might have to get somewhere and who knows how long it will be before I see again and also it's such a dangerous job... what if something bad happens to him? Anyways I guess I'm just trying to say that I'm pretty worried about him. So do you think I should tell him my concerns?

The second question is that ever since I started dating him I've been having alot of people who have been telling me we shouldn't be together. it's because he's white and I'm black... I mean his background doesn't bother me but I don't know why everyone else keeps bringing up this the whole race issue... so I guess I'm just hoping to get your thoughts on the whole interracial dating thing.

Hello Mimi,

You can't have a healthy relationship without trust and communication, and for that reason you should be open and honest with him about your fears. He will expect for you to be worried about him. If you are ok with having a boyfriend in the military, and you think he is a great guy then go for it! Be honest with him about your fears, and then release that stress. There is no need to continue holding onto it. Your best bet would be to keep in touch with him as much as possible, and pray for his safety.

I believe that interracial relationships are beautiful. A person should not be judged according to their skin color. If you care about him that is all that matters. When it comes to your family and friends let them know that this is who you have chosen to be with, and you would appreciate their support in you being happy with your man. If they really care about you they will learn to accept the two of you being together. This will not be an easy rode to walk down, but I do believe that where there is a will there is a way.

Hope This Helps! 

Chauntel
www.askchauntel.com
askchauntel@gmail.com

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