Thursday, June 27, 2013

Is He Using Me For My Friend?

15-year-old Beth from England writes:
Hello Chauntel!
I’m a massive fan of your channel, I love it! and i find everything so useful and always cheers me up! :)
I need your advise on a few things because I have 3 older brothers and no mum so never get any advise, so I always look to you as a big sister :) I like this boy, but he use to fancy my friends, so he became friends with me so he could spend more time with my friend who I fancied, this happened twice and I’m not sure if he likes me as a friend or just using me? cos I really like him, what should I do???
and I also like this guy who lives 5 hours away from me and its really hard, we skype every week but I miss him always cheering me up, what should I do? and I’m always feed up as guys fancying me when they meet me but not when I get to know them cos I’m out going and stuff, should I change myself?
well I hope you can help,
from your little sister
Beth :)
teens by imagerymajestic
by imagerymajestic
Hello Little Sister Beth :)
I am so glad that my videos have been helpful to you. I hope they continue to be so. I am sorry that you do not have a mom. I like how you say it better though, mum. However, I am glad that in-spite of all of that, you are a strong beautiful young women and God has allowed us to cross paths.
With that said, it would take a lot of energy for this guy to use you simply to get to your friend. However, people do this sort of thing all the time. I wouldn’t worry about it too much. Just keep your eye on him to see if he is just keeping a relationship with you to keep her around. If you feel that way you should just talk to him about it. Friends should talk these things through, that’s how friendships get stronger.
As for the guy who lives far away, it sounds like you all are building a great friendship and that is wonderful. However, I wouldn’t worry too much about trying to be boyfriend and girlfriend with him. You are so young, and a long distance relationship at your age just doesn’t quite make sense.
However, keep your friendship and who knows what will happen in the future.
As, for changing yourself. If you watch my videos you know better than to ask this question. You are beautiful just the way you are. Nothing, and no one should try to change that. The second a guy does, you drop him. You deserve to be loved for who you are, and if you don’t who else will?
I Hope This Helps!

Monday, June 24, 2013

What Do My Dreams Mean?

Deidra writes:

Hey Chauntel,

I'm new to your video's on youtube and well i could use some advice.....i've had this dream not to long ago and i don't get what the song means the only thing that i remember is that it goes " someone is waiting for me, somewhere over the sea." and idk what it means can u help thanks and i love ur advice!!!

by photostock
Hi Deidra,

Dreams represent your subconscious.

Sometimes dreams are given from God to foretell  the future. There are various texts in the Bible about prophecy through dreams. One example is when God gave Joseph a dream of what would happen between he and his brothers. The story went that his brothers would sell him as a slave. It happened not too long after. You an read about it, in Genesis 37:1-36

BUT....most of the time, dreams are just random thoughts that intertwine with people or things in your life. Maybe you have been thinking about love. Maybe you have been dreaming about traveling. One cool thing to do is, when you have a dream write it down. Then come back to it and see if you are having patterns in your dreams. You may find an interesting phenomena. 

Take this opportunity to go out on a vacation with your family, and give yourself the opportunity to meet more new and interesting people. 

It sounds like your subconscious is trying to tell you that you are in need of some love and adventure. The way this works is sometimes we get so busy in life, or we just don't pay attention to what we are in need of because we are caught up in other things. Take time to reflect and enjoy every second of life! There may be thoughts going through your mind that you are not paying much attention to that could reveal amazing adventures that you are destined to embark upon. If nothing else, write them down. It's a great way to be creative and write a song, poem, or even a short story! 
Keep Dreaming!

How do you tell your parents that you are dating someone?

Dalia writes:
How do you tell your parents that you are dating someone?
courtesy of David Castillo Dominici
Hi Dalia,

Whenever you chose to express important information to someone that  you love you have to choose the appropriate time to do so. That means, you should not share this type of information when your parents are occupied with other things.

You should choose a time that you and your parents have together without any distractions. Choosing to do so in the middle of their favorite television show or while they are on the phone is not a good idea.

The best time to have a serious conversation with your parents is when they are relaxing and don't already have a lot on their mind. For example, if you know that they had a bad day at work, or they are stressed about something going on that day, it's probably not a good time to give them this type of news.

It is important to remember not to choose a time that is great for you, but terrible for them. This is a selfish choice, and you will probably not get the type of support that you are looking for.

However, choosing the appropriate time to share this type of information is only half of the battle. You have to prepare yourself for their reaction. You have to keep in mind that they may or may not support your decision. You are their baby, and they still see you as such. They may not be ready for you to be in a relationship. It is important for you to be respectful of their wishes.

Choosing the appropriate time, will afford you the opportunity for them to have the best reaction possible. Sharing this information is important, and doing so is good and very mature of you. Also, don't give this information when you have guests with you. This should be done at a time when you are alone with your parents. You should choose to share this information when you all have leisure time, this will make the process less stressful. Always, remember your parents love you, and they want the best for you. Therefore, it is important to share and be honest with them.

I Hope This Helps!


How to Tell Her You're Better Then Her Boyfriend

Lemon Head from Louisiana writes:
There's this girl I like at my school. She has a boyfriend but they broke up and got back together again. He did something bad that almost made her break up with him. I have information that could make her break up with him what should I do. I really like her and I've come to a conclusion that she may also like me, I know this because of her body language. I've written her secret admirer notes. I saw her read one, the next day she was really happy. She dyed her hair frome red to black, I asked her why and she said she needed change in her life. Should I give her the information.
Screen Shot 2013-06-24 at 2.46.18 AMHello Lemon Head,

If the information you have to share with her deals with her physical health then yes you should share it with her. Otherwise, you should not share this information with her. She will most likely become defensive of him. Thus, you will end up in the dog house with her.

The best way to approach this situation, is express to her that you don't think he is the best for her. Then be there for her and when the time is right, express interest in her. Use this opportunity to let her know that you respect her relationship, but that you think she should know how you feel.

The key here is making sure that you choose the right time.  Then, you have to wait it out from there, but keep your options open.

BUT DON'T....and I repeat DON'T be clingy. It is unattractive. Just be sweet and then be somewhat unavailable. That will make you seem more interesting to her, and she will be more intrigued to get to know you better, you dig?

One More thing>>> This video should be helpful:

I Hope This Helps!

Saturday, June 22, 2013

How to Tell if a Girl is Interested in You - Ask Chauntel

So this girl she is confusing you. You have no idea if she likes you or what is going on between the two of you. How can you tell if she is interested? Chauntel lays it all out for ya! Watch! 

First Kiss Kissing Tips – Dating Advice -Ask Chauntel

Chauntel gives advice on where your hands should go during your first kiss. Where should his/hers go? What do you do afterwards! Watch!

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Is He Too Busy for Me? - Ask Chauntel

Hi Chauntel,

We talked everyday over Facebook for like 2 in a half months. For a few weeks he's now too busy. He has work, school, boxing. I'm understanding about it to a certain extent. I'm a Scorpio so I told him I demand attention before we got involved. Which is true! That's my nature, I told him how I felt and he feels strongly about me too so he says. He just said that everything else comes first. So in my head this is how I perceive our situation.
3 months ago.Him: Hey, your really pretty. So I'm going to give you all my time, I'm going to have long conversations. I'm going to compliment you and give you millions of you cute nicknames without coming across as an ***. You'll like me cause I'll reply back multiple times in a day and we'll have fun conversations.
Me: AwwwHim: I'm mainly doing this cause nothing's going on in my life. When something happens I'll slowly stop telling you things. And because we were never official and this is a long distance thing we can just be friends. But I still like you! It's just something grabbed my attention more than you're doing now. So just be happy that we're talking there's no rush.Me: Okay, so I was just the latest toy on the shelf. You have new ones that you like better but don't want to throw me away due to sentimental value, however you're going to leave me on here to rot?This is how I perceive everything. He's an amazing guy, the best I've ever encountered but he doesn't even reply back in the same day, sometimes 2 days. He says I'm being obsessive which I can be and was being lately do to the fact I feel like he's ignoring me. He says he's not, that he's just busy.I don't know what to do. I feel like we're in a relationship without being in a relationship. I want to end it but then I don't because he is so amazing. I just feel like if your life was so busy and you knew how I felt/was (I was very straight forward in the beginning) why would you even continue to speak to me. I know he has a life, I don't want all his time. I just want to know his life because there is still so much we don't know about each other. Also I don't want to just give up when things don't work, life isn't about taking the easy route. But I'm considering moving on, without telling him. Like keeping my options open, talking to other guys, finding myself. Just having fun, cause he's obviously too busy with his life. What should I do?

Hey Love,

Well....The guy is busy and that is a good thing. That means he has a passion about something. Give him time. Don't pressure him too much. The point is that he is including you and that matters.
It may not be all you want, but as long as he is giving you time and making you feel appreciated that is all you can ask  for.

I Hope This Helps!

Monday, June 10, 2013

5 Steps to Getting Whiter Teeth

Clarissa writes:

Hi Chauntel,

How do you get white teeth?
photo courtesy of photostock
photo courtesy of photostock
Hello Clarissa,

Here are a few easy steps to making your teeth whiter:

1. Brush three times a day
2. Use Hydrogen Peroxide with your tooth paste in the morning
3. Use a Whitening toothpaste (I use Arm and Hammer)
4. Use Baking Soda instead of toothpaste on some days
5. Use over-the-counter whitening stripes

After you have taken all of these steps at home you can go into your dentist and have them give you a tooth whitening. Have fun aiding to your pearly whites (:

I Hope This Helps!


Sunday, June 9, 2013

How do you tell if someone cares? - Ask Chauntel

Richard writes:

Hi Chauntel,

I wanted to ask you for advice in finding out if a girl really cares about you? Please notice, I didn't ask if she likes or loves you, because anyone can claim with their words that they like or love you, but its more challenging to find out if they really care about you with actions or other concrete ways.

Thanks for answering my question.

Hello Richard,

People show that they care through their actions. Just giving you lip service (talking about it) does not mean much.

You have to examine your interactions with them.

Answer these five questions:
1. Does she treat you well?
2. Does she make time for you?
3. Does she include you in her plans?
4. Does she make you feel good when you are around her?
5. Is she willing to compromise on reasonable things to make you happy?

If she doesn't treat you well, doesn't make time for you, doesn't include you in her plans, makes you feel insecure, and is not willing to compromise sometimes to make you happy, then she really doesn't care too much about you.
One thing that I want you to take note of is people show that they care through different methods. Why? Well it is simple, everyone is different. Some people show that they care buy cooking, some by purchasing a special gift, some by making extra time in their day, some by expressing themselves through music or poetry, and some by physical touch.

There is a book that I would like to recommend to you. It is the 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman, and it's less than $10 bucks. You can pretty much find it anywhere. Don't get freaked out, I know that you said you didn't want to use the L word, but face it if you care about someone you usually do love them, not to say that you have to be in love with them.
The 5 Love Languages
The 5 Love Languages
I hope you find what you are looking for.

Be Blessed,


Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Video: NSSI I Cut Myself

Does he like me? – Dating Advice – Ask Chauntel

Anna writes:
Hi Chauntel,
Okay so there’s this guy at work and my brother also works there and he randomly told the guy that I liked him.. After that he kinda started teasing me copying what I say, spraying water at me, calling me names but he’s always smiling he seems to joke with every body but when we are alone he will start telling me information that I didn’t ask for like him and his girlfriend broke up and why. I added him on Facebook and he started teasing me on there a little bit and the next time we were at work he made a comment like “what are you stocking me now you added me on Facebook” he was laughing when he said it.. So my question is do you think he likes me I’m starting to really like me but I don’t want to waste my time on another person who doesn’t like me every one at work seems to think we like each other and the guy keeps asking if my brother and mom age still making jokes about people thinking we like each other so do you think he might like me or if he’s just joking around to make the time go by faster and should I make a move or let him make the next move.
Hi Anna,
It seems like he is interested in you. Guys don’t spend time talking to girls and being playful when they don’t have any interest in them.
As far as you waisting your time, you work with the guy so I doubt talking to him is such a waste of time. From the information that you have provided, I cannot confirm or deny if he likes you. However, I do encourage you to explore this more.
There is no harm in making time outside of work to hang out. That will give you a better feel for what is going on between the two of you. He could either be playfully flirting with you, or he could just be a funny guy who likes to play around often.
Please keep in mind that dating this guy could get really gummy. One, he seems to have a relationship with your brother. If you guys break-up and he and your brother are still friends that could be awkward. Also, you work together, and I am weary of matching business with pleasure. If it doesn’t work out between the two of you, you will still have to see him at work. It’s totally your call on if you want to take the risk of dating this guy and it being awkward on the chance that it doesn’t work out because of your ties to each other.
The best thing to do in this situation is spend some time getting to know him before you choose to leap right into  a relationship with him that you didn’t really want but were just curious about.
Take this thing slow, and choose wisely.
I Hope That Helps!