Saturday, September 26, 2009

How do I get my Girlfriend Back>

20-year-old Jordan from Canada writes:

My girlfriend and I broke up a few months ago, and she basically was unhappy and wanted to see someone else who had asked her out. I have a feeling her new friend who knew this guy was an influence, but I can't make assumptions. Anyways, recently as she found out I had been seeing someone, she at first got mad then jealous and called me. She's been wanting to know her name, who she is, etc. ever since she found out and called me a couple of times to just talk with me. She reads my writing that I put on the net every day, usually every night, and changed her profile pic on facebook of her with this other fellow when she added me to facebook. My question is, what steps can I take to draw her back to me? What she did to me was pretty low considering she had applied to my university and I had an apartment for us, but I think she got caught up in her emotions, and was led by the influence of others. Is there a way that I can re establish myself in her eyes as someone to be with? I don't want to be the number 2 guy to fall back on, as I was her number 1 for two years. We had spoken of engagement in late May after I was a pallbearer for her family. What should I do to draw her back? I've gotten conflicting advice - some people say I should wait for her and let her get jealous, and others say I should just open up to her. I want to know your opinion, as I've opened up before at times this past summer and it didn't get me anywhere.

Thanks, I love the girl a lot and want her in my life.

Hello Jordan,

Sit down with her, and tell her you don't want to play games with her anymore. Let her know that you really do care about her, but if she needs her space you are willing to give it to her. But let her know that she is running the risk of loosing you. What you have to remember is why you all broke up. If her mind is wondering now just imagine what it will be like when you get married to her. Your best bet is to let her see how she feels about you by giving her time. Don't date other girls to spite her, and make her jealous. If you do date someone it should be because you are genuinley interested in pursuising some type of relationship or friendship with them. I would encourage you to give yourself some time as well. There is no need to rush into anything right now, you just got out of a relationship! But the initial thing I would do is talk to her, then give her, her space.

I Hope That Helps!