Wednesday, December 19, 2012

I am 13 and He is 18

13-year-old Addie writes

Dear Chauntel, 

I am new to dating. Last year when I was in the 6th grade I had a crush this guy who was an 8th grader but could never seem to get his attention. Probably because i wasn't much to look at. Never have been. Unfortunately he moved away this year so for a while I didn't like anyone else. Now I'm in 7th grade and a new guy moved here this year and I really like him. Theres one BIG problem though.. He's a junior and 19 years old. I know I shouldn't like him because of the age difference but there's not a whole lot I can do about me liking him. Since I never got my 8th grade crush to work, I don't want the same thing to happen with this guy. So I need some serious help. How do I get his attention? How do I make him not care about the age difference? Do I even have a chance with a 19 year old? 

Dear Addie,

I am so glad you wrote me. At  13 there is no doubt that the idea of dating is so exciting! However, you have to keep in mind that just because it seems exciting, this does not mean that it is appropriate.

If he is 18, he is much more experienced than you are in dating. This can have negative effects. I therefore advise you to leave this situation alone, and try to find interest in a guy who is on the same level as you. You need a guy closer to your age and also new to dating.

You may ask "why?". It is very important that you take heed to my advise because this 18-year-old guy is a "man" in the eyes of the state, and he could get into a lot of trouble by pursuing a relationship with you.

Also, it won't be as much fun as you think to be with a guy who is this much more experienced than you. You want someone who you can grow with. It makes the relationship a lot easier to maintain.

I Hope This Helps!


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