When to kiss a girl?

21-Year-old Timon writes:

When is the best time to kiss a girl. i knw how to build attraction but i don't knw whn is the right time to kiss the girl... sometimes i get scared that if i kiss her she might move away and say something that would make me feel awkward...

Hello Timon,

The best time to kiss the girl is when you have established that you are both interested and comfortable with eachother. Take her out and build a relationship. You may go to a nice dinner, bowling, and/or a movie. You will know when it is time to lean in for a kiss. If she is not ready her body language will tell you. If she leans in with you then you will know she is ready for a kiss. If she pulls away or hesitates just give it more time!

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

http://www.askchauntel.com/

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

www.askchauntel.com

How Honest is Too Honest?

32-Year-Old Mark from Arizona writes:

Hello Chauntel,

I've seen several of your YouTube videos and had a few questions of my own. There was a situation in college I was wondering about. In my Psychology of Sexuality class, there was a woman who seemed attracted to me despite the fact that she had already mentioned in class that she has a boyfriend. I wasn't attracted, so I simply didn't pay attention to her hoping she would take the non-verbal cues, yet it simply made her more determined it seemed. She would stare at me in class, to the point where I would catch her in the act. Before class while waiting outside the classroom, she would get close to me and stare at me, yet not say anything, which made for a strange situation. One time, she actually followed me to my next class, and brushed against me while walking past me, which was a blatant signal for me to pay attention to her. I don't understand why a woman who had already said she had a boyfriend would be pursuing me in this manner. Why is she this determined to get my attention when I've made it clear that I'm not interested? I'm a direct person and I have no problem telling someone I'm not attracted, yet without any actual communication it's not really appropriate for me to take her aside to explain all of this. She's knows what she's doing, so me pointing it out is kind of redundant, but it's annoying. In your opinion, does she want sex or just attention or something else entirely? Also, how much honesty is too much honesty? I'm a very real person and I don't sugarcoat things, so when people ask me questions I give them the real, which can be brutal at times. In terms of women, is it good to be completely honest or hold some things back? I have no issue approaching women and talking to them, but I wonder if I come across as too dominant and scaring them off. I'm what you'd call a dominant type guy, not necessarily a nice guy, though, so any advice would be appreciated.

Hi Mark,

She may not have been happy within her relationship and was looking for something new. She may have been lieing about the relationship as well. It's best to be honest with her if the opportunity presented itself. Since she was not picking up on non verbal codes you shouldn't sugarcode.Believe it or not, women like when men are firm. It makes us have more faith in the man. We feel more safe. So, don't worry about being too dominant. You seem like a nice guy, just be who you are!

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel

www.askchauntel.com

He Asked me Out. What Should I do?

15 Year Old Eloisa writes:

Dear Chauntel,
This guy asks me out yesterday! This is the first time someone has asked me out. He wants to make out with me and I don't know what to do. I have never kissed someone and I'm really shy! What should I do? I kinda want to but I'm not sure! What are some good suggestions for a first date? And where is a good place to makeout?

Hi Eloisa,

At this point you and him need to build a friend before you rush into a relationship. Everything will fall into place after that.

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel
www.askchauntel.com
askchauntel@gmail.com

How to Let Go and Move On

23-year-old Zayed from London writes:

Hi Chauntel,

I had a relationship with one Lithuanian girl she is 34 years old and am 23 . Well recently she left me just because am too caring about her saying she would like to have her own space for some time and later on i came to know that she is having affair with one arab guy and i saw her when they were moving arround in the park , but she thinks that i dont know about it.I felt very bad for myself and i was in depression for about an year as a matter of fact am still in depression , i coudnt come out of it , and certainly i feel have loss the confidence which i use to have before , self esteem about my over all looks coz i have dramatic changes in my personality which is making me feel am good for nothing, everytime i see her with him i really feel bad and depressed. I will be very greatfull to you, if you can advice me on this please. Thank You.

Hello Zayed,

It is in your best interest to take this time to focus on who you are and where you want to go with your life. It is not healthy for you to continue to focus on her and her relationship. I know that you really care about her, but you deserve to be happy.

To mend your broken heart you have to begin to do the things that you love again. Find a hobby or interest that will take your time and attention from focusing on her and her new relationship.

It is unfortunate that it ended this way for you, but it is better that she was honest with you than for her to cheat on you. I know that is it easier said than done, but it is time for you to pick yourself up and continue living life. Life is too short to worry and stress you must begin enjoying this gift of life that God has given you.

Get people around you that care about you and get involved in what makes you happy. You will soon find yourself revitalized and out of your depression. It is a mental choice that you make.

Choose happiness. Seek a therapist if your depression persist. You can even find therapy through talking to the people around you who care about you. I do.

I hope this helps!

Here is a video that is similar to your situation that may help:

I Hope This Helps!

Chauntel
askchauntel@gmail.com
www.askchauntel.com

My Friend Likes My Boo What Should I Do?

13-year-old SnuggleBerry writes:

Dear Askchauntel,

I've been talking to this guy for a few now and i've been likeing him and talking to him through the internet and stuff. The wheels were in Motion. but then all the sudden my best friend started likeing him and she knows that i've liked him for a while.She started flirting w/ him and stuff Now it seems like he's forgotton about me =[ what should i do? So far , i've been letting my friend pretty much have him , but i REALLY like this guy... am i being a little too nice?

Hi SnuggleBerry,

This actually happened to me once. It is not worth your friendship. You should talk to your bestfriend and let her know how you feel.

If you both value your friendship you should leave the guy alone, both of you. There will be many guys, but friends are not easy to come by. Let her know how you feel and you both should leave this guy alone. If he is smart he won't get between you.

Also, he is a guy on the internet so be very cautious about this. You're only 13 you shouldn't be trying to meet up with guys that you meet on the internet. Try finding a nice lad at school that your bestfriend doesn't like.

I have a video that deals with something similar. Check it out:

I Hope This Helps:

Chauntel

askchauntel@gmail.com

http://www.askchauntel.com/

Is He Too Religious?

18-year-old Essie from England writes:

Hey, Chauntel!
I love your videos, they are awesome...I could watch them all day!
Well, I kinda need some advice here. I like this boy but the thing is, he is a born again christian and so am I. He believes that one shouldn't have to date or "court" with anyone unless they are like 23 and above. ODD MUCH? I believe that once you have feelings for someone, then you might as well go for it.
At the same time, I think he kinda likes me...but I'm not sure. I'm just using instinct and those little signs he's been putting across. do you think that I should ask him out or should I just leave him alone because I he seems to be really devoted to God I wouldn't want to mess things up for him.

Hey Essie!
Thanks so much for your kind words!

Let him know that you are interested, but then let him know that you respect his religious beliefs. Religion is very important. Therefore, I would not try to pressure him into anything.

If you respect him, you will build a better foundation for a relationship with him. Stay friends with him, and in time if you still feel from him go for it. In the meantime keep your options open!
I Hope This Helps!
Chauntel
www.askchauntel.com

Domestic Violence- I AM ONE