Tuesday, October 20, 2009

She Says I am Her Bestfriend

Da Fox from California writes:

Hey Chauntel,

So i have a dilemma. Ive known this girl for since my Junior year in high school and i had feelings for her. as time went on I never told her. She got with some guy they broke up and throughout this time i still liked her. Now i do not when this happened but as i finally came to my senses and told her how i felt she told me that she saw me as her best guy friend and that she didn't want to ruin that. Now i don't know what that means because as we conversed she said that maybe in the future something might happened? I became totally clueless. Well now we are both freshmen in college. We still talk now everyday, and i still have feelings for her and she still knows it...i think. But lately she has been telling me things like, she is afraid to get with other guys because of what happened to her junior year. So my question is....What should I do? Should I still try to pursue trying to get a relationship with her please explain this too me the best way you can.

Hey Da Fox!

You should give her heart time to heal. It seems like that relationship that she was in is still taking a toll on her heart and you don't want to be a rebound.

After some time has passed you should take her out somewhere for a nice dinner. Then take her to get some ice cream or something. During the ice cream session you should let her know how you feel, and tell her that you are willing to take the risk to of graduating your relationship from friendship to dating.

Tell her that you all can try it, and if it doesn't work out you will just go back to being friends. Tell her that the feelings that you have for her will not allow you to give up just yet. Tell her that you would like to give it a try. If it doesn't work out then that's fine, but that you at least want to give it a shot.

The truth is if you are friends first you can be friends after the relationship, but if you are lovers first you can't expect to be friends later. The good thing is that you all are friends first.

IF at that point she still doesn't want to pursue a relationship continue being friends with her. Time will tell the fate of your relationship. If she is not interested there is nothing that you can do about that, and in that cause you will have no choice, but to seek out other options.

I Hope That Helps!


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